Scalpel

‘Scalpel.’

‘Scalpel’

‘I’m making an incision along the medial articulate line’

‘Yes doctor’

‘Forceps’

‘Forceps’

Doctor Gerald Handsome, the city’s most skilled fracturalotomy surgeon, opened up the incision he had made and peered into the abyss he had opened up. He rummaged around in it.

‘Bugger,’ he exclaimed.

‘Yes doctor?’

‘My wedding ring isn’t there.’ Gerald looked up at the nurse standing opposite him across the operating table. ‘Close the patient up, will you Sybil?’

‘Certainly doctor’

‘And how many times have I told you to call me Gerald?’

‘About as many times as you have placed your hand on my knee, or put your arm around my waist.’

‘Hmmm…’

‘I’m very flattered, but I’m happily engaged. Plus you’re twenty five years older than me, which is not appealing. You should be making your wife happy, not chasing after young women like me.’